I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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