Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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