like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
