I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
