I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
