I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
