I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
