every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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