Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
