I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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