Welp...herpes.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
