So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
