It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
