before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
