he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
