My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
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