I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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