Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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