In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
My hand turned me down
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
