Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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