Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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