Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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