I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
