HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
