The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Randomize
