i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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