You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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