Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
