I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
