do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
