i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I supernannyed him into submission
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I'm bleeding and have questions
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
