I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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