Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
