it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize