it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
