I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
