i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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