I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
