You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I currently don't understand fingers.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
