Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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