Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
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