The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
