I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
