I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
