STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Randomize
