hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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