I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Randomize
