You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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