dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
