Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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